Earning forgiveness is the understanding that people are not God and only God can forgive is such a nonconditional way. People can change their actions and help one to forgive and trust again.
I lneed to prove to my husband that my past is over. I need to regain his trust. I need to show my love to him by my actions.
I believe trust is earned, but I believe forgiveness is given. I do understand the process he teaches of the importance of the spouse earning forgiveness. The spouse earning the forgiveness is thereby, also in the phase of earning trust also.
I agree that sometimes people have to earn forgiveness, especially when an offense to you has been on going for many years. Your spouse has to show you that he is sincere in changing. He can do this by maybe counseling or having a Christian friend as an accountability partner. Also he could take a Bible study or class on forgiveness and being forgiven. Lastly, I think the spouse should honestly communicate with his wife about any struggles and be praying for God to help him.
Earning forgiveness, from my understanding means showing the other person that you are truly sorry for what you did and that you are taking positive steps to change with God’s help. I certainly agree with Dr. Welch.
I believe “earning forgiveness” can occur in a relationship where trust has been broken. Acknowledging the offense is the first step in the process of rebuilding trust and earning forgiveness. A person who genuinely repents of their offense will demonstrate desires to change their behavior which builds trust and forgiveness in the person who was offended. This process takes time and effort by both individuals but with the help of God, His word and godly advice from others restoration can occur.