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Lesson OneBoundaries in Leadership4 Activities1 Assessment
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Lesson TwoIdentifying Traveling Companions as a Leader4 Activities1 Assessment
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Lesson ThreeEnemies and Idiots: How to Deal with Toxic People4 Activities1 Assessment
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Lesson FourLeadership is for Grownups4 Activities1 Assessment
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Lesson FiveBecoming Your Own Growth CEO4 Activities1 Assessment
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Course Wrap-UpCourse Completion1 Activity1 Assessment
Participants 94
Discussion Questions
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Choose one or two of the obstacles to setting boundaries discussed in this lesson that you struggle with. Explain why this is an obstacle for you, and discuss specific strategies you might employ to overcome it.
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12 Replies
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The struggle I often experience when serving or observing leadership roles is fellow leaders want to do it all or, they pile many responsibilities on one certain individual. Just like the lecturer has said, learn to step away and reflect on the circumstances. Be bold enough to say no, I have enough on my plate right now.
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One common challenge in setting boundaries is the fear of losing love or approval from others. This happens when we worry that saying “no” or setting limits will make people upset, disappointed, or distant from us. As leaders, we often want to keep good relationships with our team and may feel guilty or afraid to set boundaries because it could hurt those connections. However, this can lead to overworking ourselves and feeling burnt out, as we take on too much in an attempt to please everyone.
To overcome this, it’s important to understand that setting boundaries is actually a way of caring for ourselves and others. By being honest and clear about what we can and cannot do, we can maintain healthier relationships and do our work more effectively. Starting with small steps, like saying “no” to minor requests or delegating tasks, can help build confidence. It’s also helpful to have support from friends or mentors who can remind us that setting limits is a healthy and necessary part of leadership.
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Some people fear a loss of love from others; some fear wrath from others; some feel guilty about saying no to others. Or perhaps the whole organization has a culture of not setting nor respecting boundaries. Some cannot balance love and truth; some are not supported with adequate resources so that they have to do everything themselves.
For me, one of the obstacles is lack of human resources. There aren’t enough appointed people to share the load or to be a successor, so I cannot be freed to do what is closer to my heart. Another obstacle is that the organization may not respect healthy boundaries. Under the guise of commitment to and love for the Lord, any demand is deemed justifiable.
#leadership
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I struggle with giving timely feedback and also not setting clear boundaries with my time and owning only my tasks. I’d employ a 24 hour rule to give feedback. I’d block off 3 hours each Wednesday for PD/my task completion.
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I am the Assistant Pastor of a small congregation in our local church. The last twenty-four years of my secular career was in management positions. I managed people and processes. I am a task-oriented, structured person that knows how to organize and execute to accomplish goals. Because of my skillsets and accomplishments are known, responsibilities are placed on me that are outside the boundaries of being Assistant Pastor. There are resources within the congregation that could handle these responsibilities if asked or trained to do so. I am not the person who makes these decisions as to who does what. I feel guilty if I do not see that these tasks are done, because this is the House of God and I am a servant of God who is to do everything as unto the Lord and not unto man. I do not think God meant for His servants to feel punished or taken advantage of. There are times when I feel less motivated to go the extra mile. I have dealt with this much longer than I should have. I have come to the place where I rarely volunteer for anything. I have decided if I am asked to take on additional responsibilities that are outside the boundaries, I will lovingly and gracefully say no. I am also prayerfully looking at and reassessing what I am currently doing to know what God wants me to keep and what God wants me to give up.
