This may be the most important session that you attend today. This may save your marriage, or your future marriage. I remember meeting recently with someone that actually teaches the DISC material. Again, if you want to teach this material, you need to get in contact with Walk Thru the Bible. The details are in the workbook. And you can become a trainer to teach many courses around the DISC. One course is Understanding the Love of Your Life. And I’m just simply giving you a highlight here as it relates to family and marriage. But this person told me that this saved their marriage. Because, for once, she finally understood her husband, and he understood her, and a lot of the tension disappeared. Sometimes, even if people don’t change their behavior, but you just understand how they’re wired, it helps you to take life not so personally. And I hope that you’re applying this material in your most important relationship, which is your husband or wife.
You know, they say, when you get married, that two shall become one. The question is, which one? And, I’ll tell you, it’s not an easy thing. Now the two shall become one. You don’t want this – the two just become like what the one was. You want to be this. And your partner – you were attracted to that person’s what? Strength. And that carried you through the wedding ceremony, right? And then, on the honeymoon you start recognizing some weaknesses. And now you feel a little bit sad. I mean, he or she just promised they would never leave you. So now you feeling, “Now we need to address some stuff here”, right? Or maybe it only happens in year two. Different personalities will deal with things at a different pace. But what initially attracted you are now frustrating you – at least the weakness. And so, applying and understanding this, and being versatile, and doing those five steps, that we just talked about in the previous session, with your husband, wife, your spouse, that will be a marriage saver. So we wanted you to do a practical thing.
Part 1. Building a Stronger Relationship With Your Partner
In your workbook, you will see the notes there. And it says: Please identify my two strongest scores. So that, for me, will be D and I. And for Anneli, my dear wife, she’s an S and a C. Now S and C is equally high. My D and I is equally high. So we were opposites. They often say that in marriage opposites attract. Sometimes, when you’re working the people that are the same gender as you, you will like people that are just like yourself. But, often, with the opposite sex, you like people that are very different. And I think God did that because you need the other person’s strength. And sometimes you’re the same; that’s fine. But, oftentimes, people are attracted that are very different. So we say a couple of things here.
1. One is you building a stronger relationship with your partner begins with Understanding and ACCEPTING their style. You understand people aren’t just on purpose like this. They are actually just designed that way. And sometimes, when you’re angry… I mean, did you design your DISC personality? So who are you really angry with? You may be angry with the Creator. Stop that. God created your husband and your wife to be a D, I, S, and C. Stop being angry with them. They are created like that. God intended them for a good work, and He needed them to be just like that. Part of the good works is to help complement you. So, understand them and accept them.
2. Recognize their RELATIONAL need. They all have different relational needs. We talked about what those are. You know it by now.
3. Then you need to be committed to MEET their needs and COMPLIMENT their weaknesses. You meet their needs. And you don’t try and change them all the time. My wife is a High C, so she wants things correct, and in order, and neat, and she wants to plan, right? I’m a High I, so the things can get kind of out of order because I’m focusing on the outer world. S and C has an inner world here – clothes that needs to be in order. I’m working on the projects on the outside. So after a while I’ve discovered, if I want to have that -- like, when I talk, I talk loud. My wife said, “You can’t be all over the house now. Go to your office and be there.” And that’s why office is too small. I actually go to my real office then, so I can walk around. Sometimes there’s too many people. Because I need to be loud by myself. But I compensate. And she complements me because she’s not expecting my office to be neat and fixed all the time. She would like it to be that way. We have a High I daughter. We’ve been trying to train her now for many, many years to keep her room neat and clean. How do you think we’re doing? Are we succeeding? No. You can train a kid for 18 years to become a C. If they’re an I, they’re going to be an I. So sometimes you just need to accept it. Because sometimes what’s important for you, you made that the big fight all the time. Stop it. Just accept. You love the strengths in your child, don’t you? So sometimes just relax a little bit. They’re not going to have strengths in all the areas that you want. And sometimes they inherit one strength from one parent and another strength from another one. Or they skip a generation, and they go back to grandma or granddad, and they’re a combination of you. And you can’t treat – can you treat all your children the same way? But some of you think, “Well, that would be unfair if I allowed this one to do this and I didn’t…” No. You are fair by relating to their uniqueness. It’s unfair to treat them equally – unless God created them exactly equally. But that doesn’t happen often, does it? Your children are all unique.
So our actors are going to help us show the challenge, the tension, the adventure of being married to someone that’s different than yourselves. Give them a big hand as they come up again.
Being Married to a Different Personality Style
Caryn: I love my husband, Peter Smith. I call him gummy - gummy bear. He’s like a big bear. So nice to hug. But, seriously, he’s strong. Not strong, but strong. And that makes me feel safe. He always knows what he wants, and he usually wants it now. He gets things done – like big things, like this fundraiser. He always gets what he wants. Sometimes like a bulldozer bear. People can feel hurt by that. He will easily tell you if he doesn’t like what you’re doing. Boy, oh boy, is it impossible to argue with him. Sometimes I wish he can be a little bit more sensitive and affectionate.
Peter: Oh, Caryn. We’ve been married for 17 years. She drives me mad sometimes. Sometimes I wish she would just stop speaking – even for a moment. And sometimes I wish she would finish something that she started. Anything really, but dinner is the worst. “Just make yourself a sandwich when the smoke has cleared”, she’ll say, and carry on with her telephone conversation. But she’s my sweetheart. I would never stop working if it wasn’t for her. And she’s my biggest cheerleader. She gets angry really quickly. But then she also forgives very quickly. I know with her by my side there is no mountain too high that we cannot climb.
Patrick: Oh, I love my wife, Zanele. She’s so supportive and loyal, both at school and also in church. If you don’t know, I’m also a pastor. Ah, she’s a very supportive woman. You know, Zanele is so tolerant to other people. Sometimes they hate her, and she keeps it in. She’s gentle. She’s a beautiful woman. But what frustrates me the most is that Zanele cannot really make decisions. As a result, she delays all the time, and we’re forever late. And when I tell her that that makes me unhappy, she cries. What should I do?
Zanele: Patrick is a wonderful man. But you just need to understand him. He’s always the first person to wake up in the morning, and the last to go to bed. He’ll pick out his whole outfit for the next day before he goes to bed. And don’t think he lets the rest of us be. He has the tendency to oversee everybody’s preparations for the next day. He’ll make sure the kid’s uniforms are ready. And he does this cute thing where he’ll polish their little shoes together with his. It’s so adorable. And, yes, he polishes his shoes every day. And then, he’ll wake up early enough the next morning just to double-check if everything is as it should be for the day. And after I’ve packed the lunch boxes, he’ll then repack both his and the children’s lunch boxes – only in a neater way. But I just let him be. I feel really safe with Patrick. He always has a firm grip on things. But I must say his need to constantly manage and control things makes him a little oblivious to the children’s emotional needs, and to mine.
Well, I thought they just did excellent. I want to give them a big hand again. They did fantastic. So, to build a stronger relationship with your partner, it begins by understanding and accepting their style. And I thought these couples did it great. You must know one another’s relational needs. You must be committed to meet the needs and complement the weakness. Instead of criticizing or wanting to change your wife or husband all the time, complement them. That means verbally, but it also means you adjust your behavior so that your strength can meet a specific need. And, as you saw in these relationships, it happened kind of all the time. Remember, we are initially attracted by a strength, and then we’re repelled by the weakness. So we have to reposition our mind. So, I’m going to give you now specific ways that using the DISC material and a Christ-like attitude – you can have a winning marriage.
1. Basic Motivation
Well, firstly, it starts by understanding one another’s Basic Motivation. If you go back to session 3, you will remember that the basic motivation is different for everyone. So I want you to write down: What is your basic motivation? Is it results and challenge, recognition and approval, relationship and appreciation, or to be right? And, what is your spouse’s basic motivation. So fill that in for me. And, if you are not married, think of your girlfriend, or think of your mom and dad. How did they do it? What were they like? So that’s basic motivation. For me it was ‘I like challenge’. And for my wife – my wife liked peace and order. So what I really appreciate… When we were dating for a couple of months, and I wanted to go on a missionary trip to Malawi. And, you know, my wife didn’t make it a test of my love for her. She allowed me to go to Malawi, and go on that trip. And you know what? I went on a missionary trip for three weeks, and then I had a week of fun. Because my ‘I’ wanted fun, as well. She didn’t take it as disloyalty. When I wanted to study overseas, she didn’t say – and she’s a S, relationship is important. She didn’t say, “Martin, if you really love me, you wouldn’t go and study in the U.S. You will go a Bible college or seminary in South Africa.” No, she gave me the freedom to be myself. Now, when I was there on that side, we wrote letters to one another every single day. Now I’m not a High S, but I love my wife. She would write long, High C letters. What would I write? Sometimes just ‘I love you’, put it in the mail, and send it out. When we SMS, she writes me these long SMSs. How do I write it back? Sometimes I have to stop and really give her more detail and feedback, because that’s her love language, right? But I understand her motivations. She understands mine. When I wanted to climb Kilimanjaro, thumbs up. When I wanted to take my son to go dive with Great Whites – he loves that -- she woke up a few nights and said, “Martin, do you really have to do this with our son?” -- and she let him do it. So, she didn’t constrain me and my son based on her personality. So when we understand one another’s basic motivation… Now I guess if two High D’s are married, they can just work and eat out all the time, right? I don’t know how they’ll do it. But I was attracted to someone that was different than myself. The High C’s, they probably fight on who to wash the dishes. It would be interesting. But it must be a very clean environment. It would be wonderful.
2. Accept and reject
Now, we’re not just different motivations. We Accept and Reject different things. The High D will accept the difficult, and reject inaction. When I was called to go to America, that was a difficult assignment, to immigrate, to do a specific role in missions. And that was my basic motivation – a challenge. The I in me wants new and exciting opportunities. But my wife, what does she accept? It’s friendship. That was difficult for her to go to another country, because she’s leaving friends and family. But, thank God, for Instagram, and for WhatsApp, and for Facebook, because now she can stay in touch. Because she accepts friendships. She rejects conflict. And she also rejects things are not orderly. I want to do things fast. I left school at 16, and went to the university when I was very young. And I thought it’s a good idea that my son does that, as well. My daughter did the same. But my wife is a High C student. She doesn’t just want the matric certificate. She wants the children to do well. And my son is more like her, so he’s going to finish matric when he’s 18. But he’s going to have much better marks than I had. And I had to accept that. And so, we understand one another’s basic – what we accept and reject. The D wants quantity. The C wants quality in relationships. I want lots of people to come to the party. How many people does my wife want? No, more selected friends, where you can spend quality time. So sometimes, when I have a birthday – when I had a 40th birthday or a 30th birthday, it was a big deal that she did for me. When she became 40, I invited her closest friends to go with her on a three-day retreat. She loved that. So we understand what is our ideal situation, what we accept and reject. We give space to one another. We complement one another.
Number 3. How do behave under tension? She understands that I become more autocratic. When we did ministry together, that was fun. Because when you do ministry, like student work, you don’t get angry with people. You just minister. Then I got into an organization or role where I was the CEO of a company. And when we had deadlines, what happened to friendly Martin? A little bit more ‘let’s get things done’. So I’ll be friendly outside of the work environment. But in the work environment ‘let’s get this done’. So my wife quickly understood, if she’s going to work with me in the office, and I’m in project mode, and the people get frustrated with me, what’s going to happen? She’s going to feel bad that they criticize me with her, because they feel safe with her. And she realized for her to be supportive when I do ministry work directly, like counsel people, we do it together. But when I’m in project mode, we should not do things together, because my style causes too much what? Tension. Is that okay? Now, is she unsupportive that she’s not working in the office with me? No, she’s supporting me by helping with the kids, by helping with the soft things, and by helping with… You know, when I go… Let me tell it this way. When I leave on an overseas trip, which I have to do a lot, my suitcase is packed 100%. It’s a little different thing when it comes back. But I feel my wife’s love for me for the first week. I cannot just keep the suitcase stuff in there. I see her love for me. And we understand what gives frustration and what not, and so on. So, how I behave under tension – we understand one another. And I understand how she behaves under tension. She behaves under tension -- if I just drop…if I just invite people over without notice, does that help a High C? No. She wants to prepare. So I understand that she’s going to really be frustrated with that. Once we understand one another, we start allowing for one another. Now, life is life. I still invite people over at times unannounced – true or false? And I have to live with it. And she’s going to do things that’s still going to frustrate me at times. But at least we have a basic understanding and grace with one another. So you’ve heard about my life a little bit – what gives tension for a D-I, and a S-C. But I’d like to invite our friends up again to show how this would work in other relationships. Let’s give them a big hand again.
The Tension between a High C and High S
Patrick: What’s this sticky mess? Man! Zanele, look at this!
Zanele: Patrick, really?
Patrick: I told Watambo a thousand times not to run around with his juice cup. Look at this mess. If children would just be careful, this mess wouldn’t have happened.
Zanele: They’re just children, Patrick.
Patrick: Children need discipline. But what do you know about discipline? The only thing that you know is hugs and kisses. “Ah, Watambo, be careful. Mommy will clean the mess up.” When will they learn?
Zanele: They’re just children, my love. Can you try and understand? I know it’s important for you for everything to be neat, but they can’t just…
Patrick: If they cared about us, they wouldn’t do this mess.
Zanele: So you care more about the floor than you do about your own children? What kind of a father talks like that? I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.
Patrick: I’m so sorry, Zanele. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. But this frustrates me. I wish we could raise perfect children. But I guess this is impossible.
The Tension between a High D and High I
Peter: Sweetheart, this is such an important opportunity for the school, and for us personally. The Jones’ are just the kind of family we need to spend more time with.
Caryn: Must we really go, Gummy? Mr. Jones looks at me funny. And they’re absolutely no fun. Let’s cancel and go somewhere else.
Peter: You have known about this dinner appointment for weeks. You need to be ready in five – no, three minutes! We need to be at the restaurant before them. So you need to be in the car in two and a half minutes.
Caryn: Why do we have to be at the restaurant before them? It’s not a race. Mrs. Jones always looks perfect. So I need to look perfect. And that takes more than two and a half minutes.
Peter: But you didn’t have two and half minutes. You’ve had two and a half weeks.
Caryn: I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that. I’m tired of your important people. I’m tired of always having to say the right things to them. Why don’t you just go alone? It would be for the best.
Peter: There is no way that you are not coming to dinner with us.
Caryn: You never care how I feel, or what I think, or what I want. It’s always about you, and your stupid school. A busy school is a stupid school!
Peter: My stupid school? What about your stupid tuck shop? I work at the tuck shop. No, I own the tuck shop.
Caryn: You don’t love me, Peter Smith.
Peter: First I had a stupid school, and then I don’t love you. Fine. Then I don’t love you.
Caryn: And I don’t love you more.
Peter: No, I don’t love you more.
Caryn: No, I don’t love you more more-er.
Peter: Ah, somebody save me!
Caryn: Shall we go now? I think my two and a half minutes are up.
Peter: Yes, dear, let’s go. Honey? Sweetheart?
Friends, did you realize that all marriages have conflict? You can be a D and an I married to a S and a C. Or you can be like the first couple, an S married to a C, or the second couple, heaven forbid, a D married to an I. None of them were 100% compatible. They all had different motivations. They all had different personalities. But God brought them together. God wants them to work it out. And it can work out. Don’t give up on your marriage just because your wife or husband is different. Remember you were attracted to them. The strength has a backside that’s a weakness. But if you work at your versatility, if you accept one another, and you work at it, instead of this happening, this can happen. The two can become one, and be a blessing to the world.
So, in #4 in your workbooks, it says here you each bring a different value to the team. Your value may be that you initiate change, as a D. Or in an I, that you create enthusiasm. And it’s not just what you bring to the husband or wife, it’s what you bring to your family. You’re value may be, as an S, that you build relationships. Or, C, that you pursue excellence. So write in there: What is your value to the marriage team? What is your husband or wife’s value? And often it’s not going to be the same. And if it is, that’s great, as well.
Now the next one is how we use time. We all live in different… We live in the same 24 hours, but we think of time very differently. The D is the urgent person. The I, because they’re always thinking about the future, they can procrastinate. They want to do the fun things, so they avoid the tough things. If you’re a High I with a Low C, you hate doing your taxes, don’t you? You leave it to the last minute. And the poor C wife or husband, they want you to do the taxes immediately. Because they want to do things soon. And you kind of procrastinate until there’s enough pressure on you. The S lives in the present. They’re not hurried people. I remember, if I walk with my wife, I’m always like 10 steps ahead of her, and then I have to walk back and catch her. Now that I’m getting more mature, I only walk about two steps in front of her. But you know what we do… And I want to be serious about this. For the last five weeks we walk together, and we hold hands. And, in that way, we actually walk next to one another. If we don’t, I’ll be there and she’ll be here. But we use time – our pace is different in life. The C wants time to reflect about what happened in the past. The I wants space to dream about the future. And you’re wife wants to debrief about what happened in the day, if she’s a C – or maybe any wife wants to. So, give her time to talk, to debrief. Remember the D is urgent, but the C lives in the past. So all of you are different.
So, how do I use my time -- identify that – and how does my spouse use their time? So write there in the workbook. And then, what you do is you allow for one another. So sometimes you can do life based on this person’s preference. And sometimes you do life based on the other person’s preference. You don’t always just meet one another in the middle. Does that make sense? So, if you want to have a happy marriage, don’t try and kind of synchronize the pace. I will walk a little bit slower. You’ll walk a bit faster. Sometimes you do that. But sometimes you invite lots of people to the house, and meet the I personality’s need. And sometimes you just bring close friends. And you don’t always bring an important person in so that the meeting is productive. Sometimes it’s just relational. Does that make sense? Good
Number 6. I would improve my effectiveness with…
Now, if you’re a D, you need to write the word in LISTENING. That will be true in any marriage. If you’re a High D, you need to listen more.
If you’re a High I, you need to PAUSE more.
If you are a High S, your partner probably would like you to INITIATE more.
If you could be more ADAPTIVE, if you’re a High C. Not so rigid. Listen, it’s easier to change yourself than it is to change your partner. True or false? And, you know, the more you change the more they will change. That will happen. But if you’re first agenda is, “I’m going to fix this person, change this person”, then you quickly get into an awkward struggle.
Part 2. How to Maximise Your Relationship with Your Children
How to Maximise Your Relationship with Your Children -- big, big, big. Now, when they’re little, you will see some things. And, as they become teenagers, you will definitely see what combination of D, I, S, or C you have. But here you want to be very sensitive. And you also want to be sensitive to your wife’s needs in terms of how to relate to the children. Remember the Prodigal Son? There were four things that the father did. What did the father do with the High D child, that said, “I want my inheritance now”? -- he gave him the freedom. So sometimes High D’s – don’t just always say no. There must be a good reason to say no. Say yes more often. The D’s and the C’s, as parents, you need to find reasons to say yes more often. The S’s and the I’s, maybe not. Little bit more no, right? Then the second thing that the dad did is, he gave the kid freedom. But when he came back, well, he gave the kid consequences. The High C dad all understands about that, don’t you? He gave the kid consequences. He didn’t go and bail him out. If you’re an S mom, can you stand that the kid suffers consequences? No. But then the dad gave mercy to the child. So a High S parent is good with giving mercy. Sometimes that’s what the kids need. So if you see an S… Your kids need all these things. They need D, I, S, and C inputs in their lives. And God made you who you are. And God made your wife or husband differently. And then, interestingly, the dad – remember the elder brother told the dad, “Oh, you going to throw a party for him, and he was away all this time?” So the younger son attacked the dad, remember? What did the dad stay? Consistent. Kids need that. They need sometimes you to be a consistent parent. The S-C in you must come out.
So, there’s not one right or wrong parenting style. And sometimes, when you go to seminars, you must listen carefully who’s giving the teaching. If you’re a S-C, and the person is a D-I, will his or her advice work for you? Not so much. If you want to grow a church, and you are a C personality… If you listen to High I on how to grow a church, are you going to be able to do it that way? No. But you can learn and maybe get an assistant pastor, that has a High I, that can follow some of that. True. So you compensate and complement -- and with your children, as well. How do you relate to a High D, when he needs to get home at 11:00 – your goal is you don’t want them to stay out? So you tell your High D child, “I want you to be at home any time before 12:00”. You give him freedom. That’s a C dad. No, okay, any time before 10:00, right? But don’t tell them, “You will be here at 10:00”. Do High D children like control over them? So relax a little bit. If you have a High I child, “Listen, if you come back – I want you to be here at 11:00 and I have a surprise for you”. The High I child will run and be there at 11:00. The High S child, you tell him, “You know what, mom and dad is going to stay up. And we’re going to have a cup of coffee with you. And we’re so looking forward to hear how much great fun you had, and who you met”. The High S child, he wants that, right? The High C child; it’s easy, just tell him, “I want you to be here at 11:00”. Wonderful. And you all love your High C children because they keep their rooms neater, right? I love them, too. But give grace to a D child, an I child, an S child, a C child. They will do academic life differently. They will choose vocations differently. If you have a dream for your son to follow in your footsteps, but he doesn’t have your personality, that can be tough. And so, find out what the kid is like, blossom that, encourage that, dream about it. If you catch them doing something that’s in their niche, in their gifting and calling, dream for them. Don’t just dream stuff that’s outside. If you and your husband have degrees, but your kids are not inclined that way, don’t dream High C dreams for them – academic High C dreams. If he’s also or she’s a C, there’s other stuff you do that you could dream about that. But understand your child. Accept your child. Challenge your child differently. Motivate them differently. If you do that, you’ll be a blessed family.
So then, lastly, because some relationships are really in the ditch -- they’re in the mud – so, I want to give you four things that’s going to help you get out of the ditch. Because sometimes to apply these things we’re in too much trouble to just do it. So the first thing I want to ask you is:
[A] Do you ACCEPT your wife, your husband, and your child? Do you really accept how they were made? I want you to do that. I want you to close your eyes. And I want you to confess to the Lord if you wish your child was a different personality type. Because you may be so offended by their weaknesses that you just wish they were not like that. And I want you to ask the Lord to give you the grace that you can accept them. The Bible says, ‘accept one another’. Somebody said, “Lord, this is difficult. It is so offensive to me – the sloppiness, the criticalness, the instability. They do this or that. Lord, help me to accept my family – each person. Forgive my critical spirit.”
[F] Number 2. In their weaknesses, they have sinned against you, and sinned against God. It’s not just that sometimes you were right and they were wrong. And it’s not just a personality thing. So there you just don’t accept them. You simply FORGIVE them. Some of you got divorced because you couldn’t… and you were so different. You need to forgive. I encourage you – if you haven’t done the TEN course on Forgiveness by Dr. Bruce Wilkinson, to get that course and do it. It’s a wonderful blessing to give your life unto other people. You really want to do How to Forgive by Dr. Bruce Wilkinson.
[C] Number 3. I want you to make a decision that you are going to COMPLIMENT -- compliment versus criticize your wife or husband -- Compliment. Come around their weakness and compensate for it. So anticipate where there is not going to be wholeness, and then prepare yourself not to try and change the person, but to come in and help. So, why don’t you decide; instead of that being the thing that you always going to bump into, why don’t you just accept it, give it over to the Lord, and just help, compliment, do something? Huge. At the end of the day, life is about what? Relationships. Loving God and loving people. And if you make your values -- your D, or I, or S, or C values -- the highest goal, then you worship that. Stop worshiping what’s so important to you. Start focusing on relationships. Stop fixing other people. And stop criticizing and gossiping, when you’re with your friends, about your husband or wife being this or that. Stop. It doesn’t help. That’s disloyalty.
[C] And the last one is CELEBRATE. Celebrate the differences – that your kids are different. My son may become an engineer. But he’s good with lots of things. And he’s good in areas that I’m not good in. I celebrate that. I love it. My daughter, if I focus on her strengths – she’s a High I. I love her. She’s also an S. I celebrate that. I celebrate the fact that she has many ideas. But when she sticks to it, she works hard to accomplish it. And I celebrate her achievements. And my wife -- I’m so happy…I’m so happy she’s different than me. Elvis, you’ve been at our house. If Anneli was the same as I was, would you like to stay over at our house? No, you just visited. But you really wouldn’t want to stay over there, right? No, she’s different. And that’s why that house is a wonderful place to go to. If we were the same, it would be chaotic. Or it would be boring if we were the same. It’s different. It’s dynamic. It’s wonderful. And God intended it that way. So I want you to celebrate.
Do you know what I want you to do? Take out your cell phones, as we end. And I want you to say something about – text message your wife or a kid, and say something that is wonderful about them. Celebrate one of their strengths. I’m going to do it now with my daughter. For real -- we do it now for real. I want you to celebrate either your husband, or your wife, or a child. And say something about their…say something about their strength. And then, what you do is you… Well, the cell phones are coming on. That’s wonderful. Say something about their strength, and then text message it out. So there it goes. Actually, I’m going to see if my wife knows I’m talking so much about her. I’m going to write her a message. That’s great. I hope if you’re in the audience, and you listening by television, or you’re doing this on the Global South in West Africa, East Africa -- wherever you are, I hope you’re doing that right now, that you’re celebrating and just depositing something into that emotional bank account today. That’s going to be great.
Well, we’re closing the session. I’d like you to go in your workbooks, and fill in those questionnaires. The deans will have a discussion. And I think the husbands and wives have a lot to talk about. And may God bless our marriages. May His face shine upon us. May we accept love and celebrate one another. Looking forward to the next session. It’s going to be lifechanging, as well. Thank you.